No new word about the Mom Jeans crisis.
I forgot to put a dollar in a pillowcase outside of the kitchen door.
Got so anxious I ate the chocolate the jean-nappers demanded.
Can't wear shorts because the weather changed.
Waiting for further directives from Doctor X.
Missing My Stretch Waist Jeans,
St. C
9 comments:
to: St. Casserole
from: Doctor X
Just as I was about to clip the pants pocket, Doctor G ( my slightly less evil associate) suggested that such primitive behavior was not worthy, so we took them to the University of Southern Mississippi game and in front of all Mississippi had Seymour the Eagle (mascot) wear them as he taunted the Houston team. They were quite scared, especially when Seymour told them that, if they won, he would make sure each and every Houston player had to wear similar stretchy pants. Needless to say, USM won!
So, AHA. You have one more chance...chocolate, pillow case, Tuesday, or pants pocket on the mailbox on Wednesday. Do not fail!
Doctor X and Doctor G, the slightly less evil second in command of the Stretchy Pants Libertaion Front Army
St Casserole, please just pay their demand so you can have your mom jeans back. How humiliating to have Seymour the Eagle (mascot) wear them. And we really don't want the Houston team to wear them.
I'll even pitch in to pay the ransom.
Don't you have some more clothes that they would really you rather not wear? If you start wearing those, perhaps they will give you the mom jeans back.
Of course you might use some pictures of them in their earlier days that you might could use as leverage.
These pant thieves sound like they mean business. Give them what they want - it's a small price to pay for favourite items of clothing!
I am saying wait them out.
I think a nice pair of sweat pants, a shirt tied the waist daisy duke style and some blue eyeshadow might make them come around. Especially if you wear that to pick any of the kidnappers errmmm....kids up.
Those pants have some power if they swayed the game!!
Ooh, princess BRILLIANT outfit suggestion. Might I suggest a jumper or a split-skirt and a shirt with very large collars.
Also, a recent survey found many of the above described mama jeans at the second hand mama jean store.
This has been too fun to read! I shared with manBoy. He laughed a little too hard. I hope he doesn't get any ideas.....
Y'all are cracking me up!
Thanks for holding my hand through this terrible time of NO MOM JEANS or as the local paper said, MOM JEANS HELD HOSTAGE.
Princess, what if I dressed like the kids at the high school?
Or stood outside of my car in the carpool line wearing runners shorts, white ankle socks and birkies?
Of course, it's easy to embarrass them. And, isn't that part of our parental job?
to: St. Casserole
From: Doctor X (and the slightly less evil Doctor G)and the Stretchy Pants Libertaion Front Army
Where is your fear? Where is my chocolate? Are you just walking the dog for me? You call yourself compassionate, but you will let your stretchy pants suffer!
This is your last chance C. Chocolate or stretchy pants will be part of the concrete foundation for a building--maybe even a Scientology building OR Dick Cheney's new duck blind in Texas. Who knows, they may end up as part of a Halloween decoration! In your neighborhood!
Resistance is futile.
With warmest personal regards,
Doctor X and Doctor G.
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