Thursday, February 21, 2008

Ask the Captain

Dear Captain,

I've never been on a cruise before. Does the ship move much? Will I get seasick?

---Rev. Daunted

Dear D.,

Cruise ships are quite large. You may feel some motion but the anti-roll thingies keep the ship steady. People wear those dots behind their ears if they feel as if they will get sick. Bring some with you because trips to the ship's doctor cost extra.
The best thing to do is to get on the ship and have 1 drink, not 47 tiny-umbrella-fruit-juice-I'm-on-a-Cruise!!!! drinks. It's fun to watch people climb up the plank and race to the restaurant to eat as though they've never eaten before, then hit the bars and drink until they are stupid. I think those people get queasy.
I get a tad peaked when I go sailing with St. Casserole and she is at the rudder. She is a faulty sailor, at best. I think you'll do fine on the big cruise ship.

Captain

9 comments:

Presbyterian Gal said...

*fans self*
Oh Captain, my Captain.

Susan O said...

Is that a picture of Mr. Casserole?

Songbird said...

That's Captain Casserole to you!

Kathryn said...

Can't I just fall in a heap at his feet and call it seasickness?
Pleeeese....

On another tack, I don't think I know about dot things behind the ears. They sound both sci fi and faintly sinister...please explain for transatlantic ignorami.

St. Casserole said...

Kathryn, sea sickness/motion sickness prevention in little dots to place behind one's ears. May I bring some for you? I haven't used them but I've seen other passengers wearing them.

Y'all, that isn't Mr. C, it's teh Clooney! Geez! Can't you gals tell the difference?

Cathy said...

Y'all didn't tell me teh Clooney was a part of the package.

I find eating in the dining room keeps one from eating like there is no tomorrow. Portion control is the key.

However Lido Deck you can eat with wreckless abandon - it's a human feed trough.

Cathy said...

I have never had to use those little dots around my ears.

I just had to come back and look at the eye candy on this post.

Deb said...

ohhhhhhhhhhhhh... no one told me either!!!

TO blazes with being "the intern" and being required to stay in town!!!!

I am going to walk to your house, squeeze my pasty lardy-butt self into your suitcase and come on this cruise. Just so Teh Captain can extricate me from her luggage..

Pass the fan, PG!

Deb

1-4 Grace said...

Okay, so is it too late to put in an application for 1st Mate?
How about cruise entertainment?
I can do great shadow figures on teh wall.
Hmmmm,...
What about a ship chaplain? Y'all will surely need one of those.
If this is the Captain, I am so in!