Thursday, June 02, 2005

Mrs. Busy Bee

I've been busier this week than I expected. I do my best to avoid busy things and busy times because I like quiet and a certain pacing to my days. I say to people, "I'm not busy".

I think I am fooling myself.

Meetings, meetings and a few more meetings this week have left me feeling that I must rush everything else I want to do.

I've observed people who stay busy all the time. I've watched them learn to expect busyness and become addicted to a frantic pace. I don't want to do that. I stopped trying to bring in the Kingdom several years ago when I realized that my job is to be faithful. Not perfect, not pushing myself all the time, not attempting to go and do what no woman has ever done before. I took off that paper SuperGal cape and stomped on it.

However, I do seem to have plenty to do. I'm not bored. I'm not trying for perfection. I have things to do.

I'm contemplative by nature while also being an extrovert. Such a fun combination. I charge myself up by being quiet and alone. I get re-charged by being with people. Finding a balance of alone-time with people-time takes some doing (as we say down heah.)

I know someone who isn't happy alone nor does she want to be with people. She spends her time working full-time and taking a different class every evening year round. She has several degrees and many certifications. I am not fond of her. Her busyness puts me off. Her activities keep her from forming deep relationships and from having an interior life.

Critical, aren't I? I see her and think, "O Lord, please don't let me be like that."

I have many interests, friends and younger children. I could fill every minute with church, home and community work. But, I'm not going to do this. I want a full life of staring into space, being deeply engaged, living in the present, enjoying simple pleasures and being a good partner to my husband, mother to my children and pastor to my people.

How's it going with you?

8 comments:

SpookyRach said...

I agree!!!

Susan Rose, CSJP said...

"I stopped trying to bring in the Kingdom several years ago when I realized that my job is to be faithful. Not perfect, not pushing myself all the time, not attempting to go and do what no woman has ever done before. I took off that paper SuperGal cape and stomped on it."

.... I could learn a lot from that. I try to be SuperGal too much of the time I think.

Revmom/Cheesehead said...

Amen, amen, amen!

Quotidian Grace said...

Boy did I need this reminder. Thank you. My friend D and I take turns telling each other "it's time to get that "NO" tattoo refreshed on your forehead.

PPB said...

I just want you to stay unbusy enough to keep writing stuff like this.

Princess of Everything (and then some) said...

~applaudes~

Glory said...

A lovely piece of writing. Thank you.

the reverend mommy said...

Me too.
I want a few weeks of the year to just stare into space.
The kids and I are deliberately not doing a lot this summer -- for this reason. I take it in seasons. This is the lazy season to stay at home, re-group, build relationship with my children and take care of home. Fall comes soon enough.