Saturday, June 09, 2007

How to Prepare Your Child(ren) for the Coming of a Sib

I take as my text this morning, how my mother prepared me for the birth of LLS. 1When a new child will be coming to the family, let your child pray for the new baby. This can happen easily during bedtime or family table prayers.

When your pregnancy begins to show, let your child feel your tummy. Feeling the kicking baby, later on, will entertain your child. You can tell your child, "you can feel the new baby and when the baby is born, you can tell the baby that you felt the baby kicking BEFORE the baby even met you!!!"

If you are given a baby shower, make sure that you have a gift for your child or have a friend bring your child a gift. I recall that LLS got many baby shower gifts but that I got gifts, too, because I was the older sister.

Convey no fear about your going to the hospital to give birth. Be as matter of fact as you can treating the birth as no big deal. How does the baby come out? The answer is: God made Mommies bodies so that they can have babies. 2
Spend time with your child after the baby comes so that the child feels comfortable with the new baby. Somehow, I never felt left out or

I loved LLS from the first time I saw her. She was a tad gross with nasty diapers and a scab on her navel, but cute and snuggly. I felt my prayers helped get her to us and I felt that my mother's pregnancy was a normal time for our family. I was a brand-new 6 when LLS arrived.

We prepared LS for LD's birth as best we could although unlike a bio pregancy, with adoption you aren't always quite sure when the baby will arrive. He did a bit of acting out when LD arrived but mostly took pride in his sister, especially when people commented on her. 3

Footnotes: 1) Old-preaching used this phrase.
2)Tell your children whatever you wish about how the baby comes out of your body. I like the discretion of my Mother being at ease that "God created Mommies this way".
3)Remember, I am not a parenting expert and am parenting still a teen and older teen.I thought about writing on this topic while recalling that my older sister seemed to resent me throughout my childhood and may resent my presence to this day. Maybe Mother learned from the sour reaction of my older sister and so prepared me for LLS's birth in a different manner.


St. Casserole
(Next topic: Why is Blogging a Post Easier than Finishing My Sermon?"


DevilMacDawg said...

How timely for me. Thank you! :)

Psalmist said...

One of my choir four-year-olds is expecting the birth of his new sister. I found out about it from him before his mother announced it, during the prayer time we have with the children each week. He even decided on her first name. They were leaning toward a "Texas city" name for her, as they'd done with their son (firstborn), but he shook his head and said, "No, Mom! Her name is _________." The mom and dad decided they really like that name. It's alliterative, and they even have a cute family joke about it. They seem to have approached the pregnancy very well with him. We're all full of joy at her pending arrival. I can hardly wait for the adult choir to sing "our" baptism anthem (lyrics by moi) for her when the time comes.

I love your suggestions. They make a lot of sense and show a lot of love and respect for the expected child's sibling(s).

Songbird said...

I almost always need to write about other things first on sermon day. I hope this helped you!

Karla MG said...

We were pretty forward with body basics (actual language), had a couple of "Christian" body books, etc., so DD1 knew that "her babies" were in mommy's uterus. In fact, after the twins were born, we got a call from the babysitter, very upset. She wanted us to talk to our daughter about her "inappropriate language." The crime: when another kid at the daycare kept saying his mommy was gonna have a baby "pop out of her tummy too," DD1 nonchalantly corrected him..."no she's not, the baby's in her uterus." ;)

She also attended "big sister school" as she called it...simply a class the hospital offered for older sibs.

DD1 had "begged" for a younger sib, then shortly after the Rugrats movie came out, started asking for/saying we would have twins (about 2 months before we knew for sure). Once we knew, we settled on M for DS, and then DD1 said she liked J for stuck, so she takes a lot of pride in having helped named her little sis.

Littlemankitty said...

I wish someone had done this with MY sister.

PPB said...

I lvoe it when hospitals have big sibling classes.

Princess of Everything (and then some) said...

Babygator would sit on one side of me andtalk to bebo before he was born. Then, she would sneak over the other side and speak to him. You could visably see him turn over to the sound of her voice. He adored his big sister from day one.